Thursday, July 21, 2005

My grandfathers clock

My grandfather passed away recently, I wrote this eulogy…

To some of us Johan Gerhard Neumann was known as Gramps, to others Dad and to others as 'Joop'. To one very special person He was known as ‘love’. All these expressions of identity by their very implication set the theme of this eulogy.

My grandfather was a man of many coats...

He wore the coat of a friend
This coat was warm, lined with smiles and laughter. Stitched with good humor, its’ buttons bore the mark of mischievous playfulness. A very fine coat indeed!

He wore the coat of a father
The coat of a father is a mysterious thing. At times it is soft like cashmere at others tough like leather. His was one of provision and care.

He wore the coat of a grandfather
Well worn even threadbare in places. This coat was a coat of stories, laughs, ‘spoils’ and fun; definitely a favorite.

He wore the coat of a husband
This is the most elegant of all his coats, definitely the oldest. It is hand woven with commitment. Soft creases and folds speak of its comfort. It’s lining closest to the heart of the one who saw him wear it most often; their love leaves a legacy.

Gently, as he now wears the coat of passing, he leaves us with our coat, his mantle if you will; this is a coat of fond memories.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your gramps. The memories he left with you set me thinking about life and the "legacy" we leave behind. I don't have any concrete conclusions, merely a few wonderings about the matter. (Please note: when I speak of legacy, it includes the following concepts: "permanent positive influence", "quantifiable change", "betterment of others' lives", etc.)
My thoughts are:
Are we to strive to leave a legacy behind - to leave permanent footprints in our circles of influence? And how far are those circles of influence meant to stretch? Is it fine to leave a legacy behind only in the circle that includes friends, family, work colleagues and those who cross our paths? Or do we have to work beyond that to leave behind a legacy that stretches as far as changing our communities? This raises the question "How much is enough?" Is it enough to love our spouses, raise our children lovingly to build strong family units, work with excellence, love compassionately and help those in immediate need that cross our paths? Doing these things would probably have a ripple effect in the lives of individuals, and in so doing, have a positive affect on our community, though small. Or are we to reach for the stars, in a sense, and devote our time, energy and money to bringing quantifiable change to our communities? What if our family life suffers as a result? Does the fact that we are changing communities justify the fact that we are neglecting our families? Or are we to take all of the above on board (spouse, children, work, community work, friends, etc.) and try and balance it all? Or, when you are trying to influence a community, does balance in your personal life become a nonsense concept?
I suppose the bottom line is this: can one leave behind a legacy in one's community AND live a balanced life with a loving, healthy family? Or are the two concepts mutually exclusive?

These are just a few thoughts that zoom around in my head.